So let's talk about Amos Yee today, in the spirit of Chinese New Year; the very festival he tried to hard to make fun of but failed so miserably. Apologies in advance for the lack of video, because being a typical pussy, he removed it just hours after claiming that he was unaffected by the bad publicity. Also, an honorable mention to Dee Kosh, who in a stroke of brilliance, publicly announced on little Amos' Facebook page that there's no such thing as bad publicity. Oh which genius came up with that, we'll never know; kind of like the biggest irony in human history.
Now I've always had my doubts that thirteen year old kiddies these days should be allowed to have their own opinions, much less make a video about it; and I was right.
This is his Youtube page:
I don't really need to underline the sheer stupidity of his introduction. By the way Amos, your videos don't give me that feel at all. Well maybe, if "whiny baby" counts. If that isn't enough, I think I can give a proper diagnosis.
The kid is suffering from a massive case of ego boost. FYI, he was the winner of 'Best Actor' and 'Best Short Film' during the First Film Festival(FFF), an event hosted by The New Paper and the Ministry of Information, Communication and the Arts (MICA).
So being a winner of a local event, little Amos for some reason, decided that he is now famous on the internet; you know, something that caters to hundreds of millions of people around the world, just because he won some local award that I personally couldn't give a fuck about up till today, when I needed some facts to back my shit up.
In all honesty, most of us should find his comments familiar, because we too, have similar thoughts once in a while. Come on, who doesn't hate [insert race] person A and B every once in awhile. What separates us from Amos is that we've acquired the all-important skill of keeping our dirty opinions to ourselves. He on the other hand, blared them all out with a fucking virtual loudspeaker and sprinkled his trademark ego on top, so that everyone would know that he's out to embarrass himself. Quite frankly, I'm looking forward to the sequel; when he comes back to school and gets massive flak from the school bullies.
I don't know if Amos gets locked up in a cage during Chinese New Year, because he obviously hasn't seen what a true family gathering is.
10 a.m: I seriously hate waking up at about 8 in the morning when I go to bed at like 2, but I'll definitely make an exception on that very day. Going to my aunt's has always been the mother of all visitations. I mean sure, we have family gatherings there quite often, but I'll never get bored of the endless entertainment that awaits me.
12 noon: So we arrive at 12, just in time for some of the most epic food I've ever seen. BUT WAIT, what's that I see on the table? OH PINEAPPLE TARTS. I swear to God, my aunt set three plates of those babies on the table and every fucking crumb was gone in 30 minutes.
Following which, I had a cool plate of roasted pork, ngor hiong (fried minced pork?), Chinese style noodles and then my favorite: a bowl of fish maw soup with a generous amount of abalones.
2 p.m: After collecting enough red packets to keep me smiling for weeks, it's time to throw some of them on the table with countless games of blackjack, pair, heart attack and many more. My cousin and I were dominating in pair, but lost it all because the banker had ridiculous luck this year. We won like $4.50 each though; enough for lunch the very next day. While us amateurs were flapping cards like champs, other relatives enjoyed rounds of mahjong. It's a typical Chinese New Year gambling den.
5 p.m: So my other cousin's birthday falls on the 26th, so we decided to celebrate her birthday early. Stricken by an illness, she's temporarily wheelchair-bound. Being the fighter that she is however, the 21st birthday heroine was all smiles as we presented to her, a ginormous cake and an iPad2. Additionally, I took a video of my aunt bragging about her boobs. But since I can't post lies on the internet, being the saint that I am; I won't.
8 p.m: I definitely had no problems eating the same food again, but having snacked like a fat loser, I couldn't bring myself to eat more. After dinner, since majority of us possess an iPhone, we treated ourselves to Scrabble and Monopoly. I still miss the physical version though. Bidding our farewells after wasn't a big deal, because we're a close-knitted family that regularly meets for explosive, bitchy fun. In fact, after writing this post, I realize just how much I love my relatives, annoying as a few of them might be.
At this point, I wanna ask, "What the fuck were you doing with your relatives, Amos?" Well I guess that's not too hard to answer; probably getting bashed for being a big-headed fucker that he is.
San Nin Fai Lok!
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